I read a blog post the other day and it got my thinking. Let’s stop thinking small, and start thinking big. Think outside of your Instagram, outside of your phone, outside of your house, outside of your city, and into the bigger picture. I’m a firm believer in serving others, sacrificing for others and putting your loved ones first. I think that’s an everyday motto, and it’s so important to remember. I also believe that in order to be selfless and giving, you should find your own happiness first. If doing good for others makes you feel unhappy and unappreciated, re-think the situation and think about the bigger picture. Are you unhappy with your lifestyle? Stop thinking you are chained down to your job, your location, your friendships or your relationship. MAKE A CHANGE… like now.
My mom always said, “the only person who can make yourself happy is YOU.” You have to be the one to make the change. Your friends aren’t going to change, your job isn’t going to change, and your life isn’t going to change unless you make it happen. Life is so much more than the tiny space your head lives in, and I too must remind myself of that.
This is what I read in the other blog, and I thought it was beautifully written.
“Leaving opens a new door for change, growth, opportunities and redemption. You always have the choice to leave until you find where you belong and what makes you happy. You’re even allowed to leave the old you behind and reinvent yourself.” -Rania Naim
You are ALLOWED to make a change for yourself, you are allowed to leave where you live or the job you’re in, and you are allowed to REINVENT YOURSELF. I love that. I can relate to all of that. You have every right to make the changes in your lifestyle to be happy, healthy, and feel refreshed. Nobody is holding you back, even if that’s what you’re thinking.
There are a lot of things you don’t know about me… and I think my juicy stories are meant for another day, so let’s talk about something that hugely relates to these issues– FEAR. What are you afraid of? Why aren’t you making the changes you need to make? Like I said before, think of the bigger picture. Get to the root of your fears. Think long and hard about what keeps you from making changes and how you can overcome those fears.
Looking at the smaller picture:
- Being trapped in the shower with a mosquito. (that happened yesterday. I worked hard to kill it and it just never happened. I came out alive.)
- Sea creatures. Seriously, I am deathly afraid of anything that swims beneath me. That goes for tiny little fish too. I can’t do it.
- Public speaking. Oh my gosh, you guys. I pray that my little sister doesn’t have a big wedding so that I don’t have to make a speech in front of all those people (so selfish, I know). College presentations were NOT easy for me.
Now, let’s look at my bigger picture fears:
- Failure. I’ve been hard on myself since elementary school memorizing the 50 states and getting tested on it. (I passed, thanks to a song my mom came up with.) Now, it’s bigger than that: I think about failing as a business owner. I think about failing as a mother one day. I could fail at a lot of things in life, and that freaks me out, because it can affect the people around me.
- Disappointment. I don’t like the feeling of disappointing others or myself. Even the smallest of disappointments give me the worst feeling deep down. That includes anything from making a less-than-savory dinner for my husband to letting a family member down, to making a friend upset, and so on. I also carry a weird amount of anger/frustration inside me when I am personally disappointed (like when I order food that I am super excited for, but it comes out totally wrong or burnt, hehe).
- Embarrassment. Literally, I get so embarrassed about the smallest things. That goes for misspelling words in my social media posts, to tripping in a parking lot, to talking about something personal that might seem dumb.
WHY!? Ask yourself, why? Why am I so afraid of failure, disappointment, and embarrassment? I’d like to think it all goes along with my background, and my story. I learned to overcome a lot of these fears, just by going for it. I might still be afraid of these things, but I have pushed myself to get past it by making bold moves. By leaving, choosing happiness, choosing change, and re-inventing myself. I’ve made a lot of decisions in my life that put my happiness in front of my fears. I made the decision to grow and leave the rest behind. Do you know how hard that can be? Because I totally do!!!
If you’re going through this right now, and actively choosing your happiness before your fears, you should be SO proud of yourself!! If you want to make a change, but don’t know how, that’s okay too!! I have a little advice. Learn to just BE. Be alone with yourself, be alone with God if that’s your thing, be open, be accepting, meditate or pray on it, let go and be. If you fight against your ability to overcome your fears, then you aren’t making room for change. I have always lived by the mantra “whatever happens, is meant to happen… just go with flow.” When you find yourself at peace about an idea and feel that it’s exactly what is meant to happen, then let it happen!
I have always been queen of planning my own path. I’m a planner, I like to think ahead and plan for the future. God seems to disagree with me on that, though. He tends to guide me in the exact opposite direction of my plans most of the time. When I have a plan set in my mind, it seems to fall apart when the time comes, and that’s when disappointment sets in. After a few frustrating disappointments, I learned quickly that whatever God has planned for me is what is best for me and it’s all happening for a real reason. That can be scary, right? That’s when my fear of failure sets in. Because, basically, all I think is, “what am I doing, this wasn’t my plan!” Then I realize, this is God’s plan for me, so how could I be set up for failure? So I learn to roll with it, go for it, and put my all into it! That’s when embarrassment creeps its way in. I feel embarrassed when I’m confused or when others are confused about my decisions. That’s when I think, “why do I care so much about what others think…?”
THIS IS MY LIFE. I trust where God leads me, and I’ve learned that leaving, growing, changing, and being open to new opportunities are all part of the bigger picture in life. This path that God has laid out for me has been challenging and pretty much the exact opposite of what I may have originally planned… but gosh it is SO rewarding. To use something as an example, after a lot of obstacles, reasons for swollen eyes, and lesson after lesson, I was guided on a path that led me to my incredible husband. I could have put up fight after fight to make things go how I had first planned, but I let go and I ended up exactly where I belong by letting go and following the bright pink carpet that God rolled out for me. I will be sharing these life challenges and stories in a blog post to come… look out for it!
Think about your fears, what are they? Think about why you are so afraid, and think about how you can overcome them. What gives you inspiration to follow your dreams?This is YOUR time!! You may not think it’s the right time, but I’ve found that the time is never just right. I have faith in you. We all have faith in you. Do you?